Douches have bad taste

[Bizarro]

Morning!

[Doctor Rock]

Feeeewww, I was worried that today's thread title was going to be "you should feel violated, Dan." 

[Berunda]

I can't stand relicing guitars. The job he did is really lousy too. It's almost funny that he didn't stop to think that the fingerboard would have worn just as quickly as the body.

[Berunda]

It's not limited to guitars or random douches sanding things in their basements either. Gibson's top of the line mandolins are "distressed." The distressing, humorously, costs a minimum of $9,000 if you look at the next model down and start doing some math.

http://www.guitarcenter.com/Gibson-F-5-Distressed-Master-Model-Mandolin-517396-i1149377.gc

[captqitn]

My ma distresses antique furniture, but I give her a pass on that.     She does a good job with it, and fresh clean paintjob on old 50s furniture kinda looks weird anyway.

[Bizarro]

"Reliced" guitars remind me of the fashion world's take on  "grunge" in the early 90's, when you could pay $800 for a flannel shirt that looked moth-eaten.

[Bizarro]

I have a hard time reconciling the Michael Franti who sings "The Sound of Sunshine" and "Say Hey (I Love You)" with the Michael Franti who fronted the Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy and collaborated with William S. Burroughs on Spare Ass Annie.

[Bizarro]

I heard Burroughs and Cobain's collab "The Priest They Called Him" again for the first time in years the other day. Man, does that suck.

[Doctor Rock]

I can't stand relicing guitars. The job he did is really lousy too. It's almost funny that he didn't stop to think that the fingerboard would have worn just as quickly as the body.

Yeah, and that's the other thing that annoys the shit out of me: some builders are using this distressing bullshit as an excuse to hike up prices on bad merchandise.  Ever heard of Nash guitars?  They specialize in "reliced" fender style guitars.  I've played a few of their instruments at a local dealer.  You pay about 2000 bucks for a guitar with subpar parts, poor finishing and pretty average workmanship.  I remember playing a telecaster with sawdust falling from the control cavity!  But, you know, the relicing hides all that, so there are plenty of nincompoops who fall for it and buy their shit.  And the relicing isn't that good either!

[Bizarro]

I prefer the other method of relicing guitars: playing them vigorously for ten to twenty thousand hours over a period of years.

[Doctor Rock]

I prefer the other method of relicing guitars: playing them vigorously for ten to twenty thousand hours over a period of years.

That takes time and effort.  Plus, most guitar players own more than one guitar, so they divide their attention over several guitars, which makes things even longer. 

I own two guitars that look worn: a japanese made telecaster form the mid 80s and a 1980 Gibson The Paul (a cheaper Les Paul).  The "the Paul" was my only guitar for over 10 years, so it looks beat to shit.  The telecaster was already worn when I traded my japanese fender jaguar for it.

I do have one guitar that was "reliced", in a way: it's a partscaster (a parts stratocaster) that I put together.  Most of the pieces I used came from older guitars, so the "relicing" is subtle and it looks natural.

Most guitar players are nitpicking doofuses who spend more time obsessing over gear than playing it.  And the net has made things worse: these guys engage in silly status wars involving gear, like in "My stuff is cooler than yours!  Top of the world, ma!"

I occasionally participate in a guitar forum.  But I never show my gear, and I try as much as possible to be content with what I have.  Because, you know, I do have a lot!  In fact, way too much.   I started playing and collecting stuff twenty years ago, so I had lots of time to accumulate gear. 

[bebopbalogna]

[bebopbalogna]

this is what happens when you combine the day off, early mornin shrimp and a thread about relicing.

[Doctor Rock]

And Ted Nugent.  It is impossible to say anything intelligent if the Nuge is involved. 

[Poop Fresh-Herbed Pickles]

I am distressed