Helter Shelter

[Doctor Rock]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/15/falcon-heene-balloon-boy_n_322736.html

the family was on Wife Swap.   

That's funny: when you read the description given by the TV show, they make it sound like the dad is a bit of a crank.  But the Denver Post article that describes what he's been doing regarding his weather research makes some sense. 

[Doctor Rock]

ah, it was an escape attempt.

Guffaw! 

[Tripp]

    


Tracy Morgan Rips Former 'Saturday Night Live' Castmates In His Book:

Tracy Morgan will be using his forthcoming memoir to let his former 'Saturday Night Live' castmates know how he feels.

In 'I Am the New Black' the comedian, who now stars on '30 Rock', slams some of his old SNL friends for treating him badly during his 10-year stint on the show.

"I had my finger on the pulse of urban comedy, but when I brought my act to 'SNL,' those motherf--kers just felt bad for me," writes Morgan.

"I can remember feeling like I was on the bottom of the totem pole. I could remember when people like Cheri Oteri and Chris Kattan would probably look down upon me. I could remember those two, especially those two, people treating me like I was the invisible guy. Now look where they're at."

"None of the cast I came up with saw this future for me. No, sir. All I have to say about that is, where's Chris Kattan now? Where's Cheri Oteri now? That bitch can't even get arrested. They're never gonna host Saturday Night Live. And that's not even mean, but that's what happened to me over there."

"There were people that treated me beautifully, like Will Ferrell and Colin Quinn and Molly Shannon. I love them. But Cheri Oteri and Chris Kattan, I never cared for them either. F--k 'em."

Morgan also reveals a night that was inspiration for the '30 Rock' episode in which Fey accompanies Tracy to an "after-after-after-after party."

"I wasn't really friends with many of my castmates at 'SNL,' but that doesn't mean I didn't roll up into 'SNL' and all those after parties with my own friends," he says. "Friends of mine were running an illegal strip club they called the Loft."

"It was in an office space they'd rented and converted into an after-the-after-party spot. They put a stage in it, they put a few futons all around, and they'd get strippers and girls to come and do shows."

"I invited everyone to go down there one week. And Tina Fey, Rachel Dratch and a few others came along. I didn't tell any of them what they were in for, so it was all cool when we got there. At first they thought it was just a private party. Then these two girls came out onstage and started [doing sex acts], and that just shut it down."

"All the grips and crew guys from 'SNL' were standing around and loving it, but my castmates took one look at that, turned right around and rushed out of there. They might have left but it was all that anybody talked about around the show for the next week."

[Doctor Rock]

Well, I dunno about you, but maybe, just maybe, those stripper parties were a bit of a faux pas... I mean, not everyone goes for public sex acts, you know? 

[brainfiber]

bubble balloon boy found safe in attic

[Tripp]

so he had some sort of alien transport device that took him from the balloon to the attic, huh..?  Pretty sneaky, kid.

[Bizarro]

The family — the entire family — would end the day by appearing on Larry King, with Wolf Blitzer guest-hosting. That's when confusion turned to madness.

Falcon was asked if he had heard his family calling his name as he hid in the attic. He said he had.

"Why didn't you come out?" his father asked.

And Falcon answered, "You had said" — pausing here — "that we did this for a show."

For a show? Did the little boy — we can all pause here — know what he was saying?

When Blitzer asked what Falcon meant, Heene, fumbling for an answer, said he was "appalled" by the implication anything had been staged.

[Bizarro]

The 6-year-old boy at the center of the runaway balloon saga got sick twice on national television when he and his father were asked during separate TV interviews what he meant about his comment that "we did this for a show."

During an ABC interview, Falcon Heene (HEE'-nee) said Friday: "Mom, I feel like I'm going to vomit." He then left the room with his mother and could be heard gagging.

During a live interview on NBC shown simultaneously, Falcon threw up into a container when his father was answering the same question.

[Bizarro]

COLUMBUS, Ohio —  A woman being driven around in a rented limousine pulled up at a coat store and announced she'd won the lottery and would pay for everyone's purchases, police said, but she ended up causing a riot when customers realized it was a hoax.

Angry customers threw merchandise around and looted, leaving the store looking as though a hurricane had passed through it, police said.

Linda Brown was arrested Tuesday after an hours-long shopping spree that began when she hired a stretch Hummer limousine to drop her off at a Burlington Coat Factory store, police Sgt. Lt. Michael Deakins said. Brown walked to a cash register and loudly announced she had won the lottery and would pay for each person's merchandise up to $500, he said.

"Well, of course, people like to hear that," Deakins said. "Apparently they were in line calling relatives who were not at the store and told them to come."

People flooded the registers as cashiers began ringing up purchase after purchase, but Brown had not yet paid the bill, Deakins said. At least 500 people filled the aisles and another 1,000 were outside trying to get in, he said.

"She was telling people she won $1.5 million," Deakins said. "But it ends up she didn't win anything. She had no money to pay for anything."

About an hour later, Brown had the limousine driver take her to a bank to withdraw money, but she returned empty-handed, police Detective Steven Nace said. By then, store employees had called in two dozen police officers to handle the crowds.

Shopper Candace Jordan said she told Brown she didn't need clothes, she needed help paying her rent.

"And she said, 'How much is it?"' Jordan told WBNS-TV. "And she promptly wrote out a check."

By the time employees realized Brown didn't have any cash to pay, police said, she already had taken off in the limo.

That's when angry customers, realizing they weren't getting free coats, began throwing merchandise on the floor and grabbing clothes without paying for them, Nace said.

"Everybody was like, 'I still want my free stuff,' and that started the riot," he said. "It looks like (Hurricane) Katrina went through the store."

Police said they have no way of tracking down the customers who stole items and fled, but they're reviewing surveillance video.

When the limousine driver realized he wasn't going to be paid the $900 Brown owed him for the day's rental, he turned her in to police, Deakins said.

Brown, 44, was arrested on three outstanding warrants for aggravated menacing, misuse of a 911 system and causing false alarms. She was jailed late Wednesday, but no charges had been filed against her related to the coat store chaos pending a mental health evaluation.

Police said they didn't know if Brown had a lawyer. No telephone number was listed under her name, and no one answered repeated phone calls at the Franklin County Jail.

A spokeswoman for Burlington Coat Factory, which is based in Burlington, N.J., and has more than 300 stores across the country, said late Wednesday she couldn't comment on the incident.

[Tripp]

somebody come up with a new thread.